Saturday, March 31, 2007

A stITCH in time SHAVES nine.



A statewide Bandh has been declared. This is to protest against the fact that the Supreme Court didn’t call the major population of India ‘backward’. This is the only country in the whole world where people blush and take pleasure of the fact that they are ‘backward’.

It came as a surprise because the ruling party called the Bandh. This meant that all the essentials would come to a stand still. That includes buses, trains, flights, offices, schools, Stock market, Public toilets (Though this should have been kept open with special consideration to emergencies)…etc…

One other thing, which I wouldn’t consider essential on other days, suddenly, became too important for me today. Did you guess BATH!! Naah! May be you were thinking of a friend of mine. It is a Saloon!!

Having been born in a Brahmin family, it is not I, but the STARS up above the world so high that decide which day of the week I should shave. Surprising but true!! If you see me with a big beard
1. No, please I am not one of those cases of love failure
2. No, I do have lot of time
3. Grr, I have enough cash to buy Razors
4. Ok that’s it. STOP there. Not a word more
It just isn’t my day to shave.

Sunday & Monday you are not allowed because it affects your great granddads (who incidentally passed away some 100 years before you were born). Tuesday it affects your dad’s youngest brother (even if your dad was born with three cute sisters). Wednesday you can, but you have to leave to office right in the morning. Shaving after 6 PM is not allowed. Thursday it affects your sisters. Friday, I don’t, as it will affect me, it seems!! Everybody says it affects, it affects but the discussion on how is subtly avoided.

Ah! Sat I could do, but the Tamilnadu govt has no concerns about my growing beard and declares a Bandh. You might want to question, why don’t you sit at home and shave on your own? To be very frank with such thick growth it calls for skilled labor.

What is worst about this whole affair of beard is that it gets too itchy. It requires lots of scratching, sometimes with both hands, to feel better. One of you smart girls reading my blog might raise your hand and ask, “If long hair gives raise to itch, does it itch in those place??” Oh God!! PLEASE!! It does, but you can’t expect me to do things in public, do you??

Saturday, March 24, 2007

Op(tic)MISTic

If you are at the beach all by yourselves. If you feel let down and very low on confidence. If you have spent quite some time sitting idle there and the world in front of you suddenly becomes gloomy and blurred.

I have just the perfect way to make this world BRIGHTER!!

All you have to do is take your glasses off WIPE them and put them back!!